Hope springs

Today has been heavenly. In fact, since Saturday night (which was full of the terrors of Blue having seen me typing this blog and worrying over what I might be saying about him), things have been, as Mary Poppins would have it, practically perfect in every way. We got up early to meet the man … Continue reading

The Dood’s Mood

The usually delightful Dood, now 9, has been testing us of late. Perhaps some of it is because Blue has been less of a handful, and his lack is her gain. Like A. A. Milne’s Good Bear and Bad Bear (Twice Times), they lurch alternately into each other’s void. It certainly doesn’t help that Doodie … Continue reading

The Beautiful Game

Today I watched the boy Blue play football. His team, the Reds, were not at full strength, but Blue was quite magnificent. He scored two goals, played the game in a generous and positive spirit, without diving, cheating or showing off, and only lost a bit of impetus in the second half once he realized … Continue reading

More like it!

Two nights out on the trot! Woohoooo! The first, a lovely, cosy old film with a glass of wine (or 4) on an enormous sofa with friends – Brokeback Mountain, as it happens, which we had all seen before but enjoyed again. To be honest, I wasn’t that keen on seeing it again because, although … Continue reading

Accept and proceed

My New Year’s Resolution is to be more accepting. Now, in many ways I am already ridiculously accepting (a sap, truth be told) but I am in the process of  learning something new and wonderful about the relationship between acceptance and trust, so bear with me, please… For the past two or three years, it … Continue reading

Bring it on!

Happy Noo Year, Reader!  Apologies for the long gap between posts. A combination of pre-festive illness (me, hacking like a good’un since November, then both children with fevers in succession) and a largely technology-free holiday in the US of A were to blame.  The children are now fine; I am hurting of head (too many … Continue reading

Moving on

Well, things have certainly changed and there’s much more of everything! But the good news is that little boy Blue seems to be trusting us more and is being very loving and open, in between truly manic episodes. At least he, and we, can now be honest about where these manic episodes come from.  If … Continue reading


A very intense, breakthrough day at Family Futures, in which Blue disclosed some truly hideous stuff to his therapist (and then us), from which we have all been reeling ever since. All I can say is our children’s birth parents and their friends have a lot to answer for. Our boy is a beautiful, clever, … Continue reading

Feeling good

A truly inspirational day at Family Futures today, the first for some months where we have all been there together at the same time. I think it worked well because we have had a couple of good days at home leading up to it and because we were all very clear and honest right from … Continue reading

Sunny side up

 When I was 50, my friend Sunbeam gave me a wonderful present. A box of 60 Well-Being cards with positive messages and pretty illustrations, written by an elderly American couple called Esther & Jerry Hicks who also go under the dodgy-sounding guise of ‘The Teachings of Abraham‘. At first I thought they were hippy dippy … Continue reading